poo.net

16:31

2006-12-13T16:15:00.000-08:00

just after my mum phoned me. Held an awkward conversation with her while stood in the loo waiting desperate to go.
It was big and pleasant and I was thinking about going in to town to do some christmas shopping. It wa sin the downstairs toilet.

13:40

2006-12-12T17:16:00.000-08:00

Pre-hospital, thought I should squeeze one out before going. New shower mat and mat thing that goes around the toilet. Mace, my flatmate, got it from home, along with a musical organ thing and a telly. And posters and stuff for his room. So we now have a lovely widescreen telly. With a lovely sound system. Lovely.

1:40

2006-12-11T07:54:00.000-08:00

I was thinking about going to hyper value to get some naff christmas lights.
Turned out they don't do them, my flatmate had already tried.

Pretty much half two every day.

2006-12-10T18:32:00.000-08:00

I'm starting to worry it's a little bit too regular. It's not real worry though. I couldn't care less when I shit, as long as it comes out without hurting. Which it hasn't. It's all been pretty much the same, lumpy squishy and easy to pass.

Wednesday, 16:00

2006-12-07T09:54:00.000-08:00

My mind was elsewhere.

18:00

2006-12-05T09:59:00.000-08:00

Lumpy, sploshy, stinky. Was thinking about the small gap between shitting and being able to smell the shit. Can I tell how smelly it's going to be before the smell hits me, based just on how it feels when it comes out? I might experiment.

Sunday, 14:35, uneventful.

2006-12-04T12:01:00.000-08:00

Today, 15:30, was thinking about buying milk.

20:15

2006-12-01T16:10:00.000-08:00

Runny, sort of. Stinky mainly.

17:20

2006-11-30T09:53:00.000-08:00

Big, sploshy. Opened the door to get out to find a stranger asking for my flatmate. When he stood in to the light I recognised him and he almost certainly got a big whiff of my massive stinky poo.

15:43

2006-11-28T11:37:00.000-08:00

Large, upstairs toilet, just before a shower so was totally naked.

16:50, massive.

2006-11-27T11:47:00.000-08:00

Downstairs, dad phoned just as i was finishing so had to wipe my arse and wash my hands pretty quick.

14:40

2006-11-25T07:06:00.000-08:00

Making a cup of tea I figured that a poo would be just the right time for the tea to brew. It was a mushy sort of crap, a soft sausage. I thought about the Home Simpson shaped radio in the toilet. I never listen to it, I'm not really there long enough. But maybe my flatmate does, since he often clogs it up, I've seen his craps sat there and they must take a while to squeeze out.
He also hasn't paid the rent. Or bills.

14:00

2006-11-24T07:14:00.000-08:00

Sloppy.

BOWL FILLER

2006-11-22T14:02:00.000-08:00

21:35, my last big plop before the Ashes. Huge, stinky. Dark. I was thinking about Dottie the whole time.

Despite having eaten shit all,

2006-11-21T08:06:00.000-08:00

Here is all the shit.
Friday I did not shit.
Saturday morning at twelve fifteen I had a solid small lump which was difficult to expell, in the downstairs toilet of a certain Vicarage in Lancing.
Sunday I had a large, soft, significantly smelly one, 14:25 in the only toilet in someone's toilet which had been hammered to bits quite impressively and for no apparant reason.
Monday at 12:35 I had an absolutely enormous turd that was probably my smelliest since starting the blog. Odd, since all I'd eaten between poos was two monster munch and a slice of toast.

19:20

2006-11-16T11:27:00.000-08:00

Another one upstairs, starting to wonder if I poo too often. Soft but on lump, easily passed, not so easily wiped but got there in the end. Probably due to eating far too much beef all day.

A lovely little story.

2006-11-16T10:41:00.000-08:00

Involving lots of poo!

Yesterday, 16:45, Downstairs toilet, solid, not too smelly.

2006-11-16T06:23:00.000-08:00

Today, 14:00, upstairs toilet, solid, lumpy, not much to wipe.

19:03

2006-11-14T11:11:00.000-08:00

Type five, upstairs toilet, stinky as hell. Used the toilet paper i bought from lidl, having to walk in the pouring rain to get it. Legs still slightly damp. Toilet will probably smell bad for a good half hour.

Poo related.

2006-11-13T10:49:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure if this is real. Quite possibly not.
http://www.biertijd.com/mediaplayer/?itemid=740

14:30

2006-11-13T06:51:00.000-08:00

Type 4, someone has found a last roll of toilet paper. I will have to go out and buy more. Downstairs toilet, soft, easily expelled.

21:15

2006-11-12T13:27:00.000-08:00

Upstairs loo, solid, lumpy, smelled like I'd been eating lots of meat. Nobody had got any toilet roll but someone had left a roll of kitchen towels in there so I had to use that. Not entirely pleasant.

TWO POOS.

2006-11-12T06:52:00.000-08:00

One last night in some stranger's house and one this morning in the house I woke up in, 65 arabella street, downstairs.
Both solid and smelly.

12:50

2006-11-11T04:54:00.002-08:00

I knew I'd need one some time this afternoon, but I didn't want to have to go in the millenium stadium so I forced one out beforehand. Solid, larger than expected probably due to massive pizza intake late last night. Smelly but had a shower immediately afterwards so by the time anyone else could go in, the smell had pretty much gone.

12:30 AM

2006-11-11T04:54:00.000-08:00

Seemed neccessary, though it was only relatively small in the end, 65 Arabella Street downstairs toilet, had been drinking. More solid than last two. Orange toilet paper.

17:35

2006-11-10T09:27:00.000-08:00

Runny, over quick, easy to wipe. Smells awful, but upstairs toilet has a fan which should be able to cope with it.

15:15

2006-11-09T07:18:00.000-08:00

Upstairs toilet (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v75/SirSandGoblin/PIC_0001.jpg)
Came a lot easier than last night's, straight out. Felt runny but lumpy on exit, though on looking was ano more than a shitty soup with clearly visible splatter. Had just eaten a bacon sandwich.

I went for a walk about 4:10

2006-11-08T21:23:00.000-08:00

5:10
I had a poo in the downstairs of my own house. It was a slight struggle, I had to hold on to the sink. I had been listening to the Velvet Underground on my mp3 player on a walk I had just had and I still had my earphones in, as such European Sun was on as I was attempting this poo. It took a while. Sadly, I don't know where it rates on the scale since, once I had finally pushed it out, it was not visible in the toilet bowl. I have to assume that it was fairly solid. It made a "Sploosh" noise as it entered the water, one which indicated a solid, somewhat large lump of fecal matter. I used approximately twenty sheets of good quality toilet roll. I washed my hands thoroughly afterwards. flushed the toilet and left the seat down.
The toilet was one which flushes exactly as long as you hold the flush down for. I flushed for approximately five seconds after I thought the stool had vacated the bowl.

Welcome.

2006-11-08T11:24:00.000-08:00

This blog will chart each and every poo I do.
I will be using the Bristol Stool Chart, developed by Heaton and Lewis at the University of Bristol and was first published in the Scandinavian Journal of Gastroenterology in 1997. Thank you Wikipedia.